Appearance
Excerpt
Excerpt from The Devil's Dictionary, by Ambrose Bierce
MACROBIAN, n. One forgotten of the gods and living to a great age.
History is abundantly supplied with examples, from Methuselah to Old
Parr, but some notable instances of longevity are less well known. A
Calabrian peasant named Coloni, born in 1753, lived so long that he
had what he considered a glimpse of the dawn of universal peace.
Scanavius relates that he knew an archbishop who was so old that he
could remember a time when he did not deserve hanging. In 1566 a
linen draper of Bristol, England, declared that he had lived five
hundred years, and that in all that time he had never told a lie.
There are instances of longevity (macrobiosis) in our own country.
Senator Chauncey Depew is old enough to know better. The editor of
The American, a newspaper in New York City, has a memory that goes
back to the time when he was a rascal, but not to the fact. The
President of the United States was born so long ago that many of the
friends of his youth have risen to high political and military
preferment without the assistance of personal merit. The verses
following were written by a macrobian:
When I was young the world was fair
And amiable and sunny.
A brightness was in all the air,
In all the waters, honey.
The jokes were fine and funny,
The statesmen honest in their views,
And in their lives, as well,
And when you heard a bit of news
'Twas true enough to tell.
Men were not ranting, shouting, reeking,
Nor women "generally speaking."
The Summer then was long indeed:
It lasted one whole season!
The sparkling Winter gave no heed
When ordered by Unreason
To bring the early peas on.
Now, where the dickens is the sense
In calling that a year
Which does no more than just commence
Before the end is near?
When I was young the year extended
From month to month until it ended.
I know not why the world has changed
To something dark and dreary,
And everything is now arranged
To make a fellow weary.
The Weather Man--I fear he
Has much to do with it, for, sure,
The air is not the same:
It chokes you when it is impure,
When pure it makes you lame.
With windows closed you are asthmatic;
Open, neuralgic or sciatic.
Explanation
Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary (1906, originally published as The Cynic’s Word Book in 1906) is a satirical lexicon that redefines words with biting wit, dark humor, and cynical observations on human nature, politics, and society. The entry for "Macrobian" is a prime example of Bierce’s style—blending mock-scholarship, historical allusion, and scathing social commentary. Below is a detailed breakdown of the excerpt, focusing on its textual mechanics, themes, literary devices, and significance.
1. Definition and Initial Tone: Cynicism and Irony
Bierce defines a macrobian as:
"One forgotten of the gods and living to a great age."
Literary Device: Irony & Reversal of Expectation The term macrobian (from macrobiosis, meaning longevity) is traditionally neutral or positive, but Bierce twists it into something bleak: longevity is not a blessing but a curse—being "forgotten by the gods" implies divine neglect, not favor. This sets the tone for the entire entry: aging is not wisdom or honor but a burdensome, absurd existence.
Classical Allusion The phrase echoes Greek mythology (e.g., the forgotten Tithonus, granted immortality but not eternal youth, withering endlessly). Bierce’s definition suggests that extreme old age is a punishment, not a reward.
2. Historical "Examples": Satire and Hyperbole
Bierce lists absurd or dubious cases of longevity, each undermining the idea of wisdom or dignity in old age:
Methuselah to Old Parr
- Biblical Methuselah (969 years) and Thomas Parr (allegedly 152 years) are legendary long-livers, but Bierce groups them with ridiculous or immoral figures, implying that longevity is either a myth or a misfortune.
- Purpose: To mock the human obsession with records and the arbitrary nature of historical "proof."
Coloni the Calabrian Peasant (1753–?)
- His "glimpse of universal peace" is sarcastic: if he lived through the Napoleonic Wars, the 19th century’s conflicts, etc., his hope was delusional. Bierce implies that old age brings naive optimism, not wisdom.
The Archbishop Who "Deserved Hanging"
- Scanavius’s anecdote (likely fictional) suggests the archbishop was so old he outlived his own corruption. The joke: longevity doesn’t purify; it just prolongs vice.
- Literary Device: Juxtaposition – The sacred (archbishop) is paired with the criminal (hanging), undermining moral authority.
The Bristol Linen Draper (500 Years Old, "Never Told a Lie")
- A parody of pious legends (like George Psalmanazar’s fraudulent memoirs). The claim is so absurd it highlights how longevity tales are often lies themselves.
- Theme: Hypocrisy – If he’s 500, his "truthfulness" is the real fiction.
3. Contemporary Targets: Political and Social Satire
Bierce shifts to American figures, using longevity as a metaphor for stagnation, corruption, and delusion:
Senator Chauncey Depew (1834–1928)
- A real politician known for verbose, empty speeches. "Old enough to know better" implies he chooses ignorance or malice—aging hasn’t brought wisdom, just entrenched folly.
- Theme: Political Decay – Long careers breed incompetence.
The Editor of The American
- His memory of being a "rascal" but not the "fact" of it suggests selective amnesia—a jab at journalists who whitewash their pasts.
- Literary Device: Paradox – He remembers the label but not the deeds, exposing hypocrisy.
The President (likely Theodore Roosevelt, in office 1901–1909)
- "Friends of his youth" rising without "personal merit" implies nepotism and cronyism in politics/military.
- Context: Bierce, a Union veteran, despised political corruption post-Civil War. This is a veiled attack on Gilded Age elitism.
4. The Macrobian’s Poem: Nostalgia as Delusion
The verses (likely Bierce’s own) contrast an idealized past with a grotesque present, using exaggeration and bathos (sudden shifts from lofty to mundane):
Stanza 1: The "Golden Age" (That Never Was)
"When I was young the world was fair / And amiable and sunny..."
Literary Device: Irony & Hyperbole The past is described in clichéd pastoral terms (bright air, honeyed waters, honest statesmen), but the exaggeration ("jokes were fine and funny") signals satire. Bierce mocks nostalgia as a form of self-deception.
Theme: The Myth of Progress The speaker’s youth was allegedly perfect, but the absurd specifics ("women 'generally speaking'") undermine the sincerity. Bierce suggests all eras are flawed; longing for the past is foolish.
Stanza 2: The "Decay" of Time
"The Summer then was long indeed: / It lasted one whole season!"
Literary Device: Anti-Climax & Bathos The complaint that summer "lasted one whole season" is ridiculously trivial, exposing the speaker’s pettiness. Bierce mocks how the old magnify minor inconveniences into cosmic injustices.
Weather as Metaphor The "Weather Man" (a new figure in the early 20th century) is blamed for modern discomfort—a joke about scapegoating. The air is either "impure" (pollution) or "pure" (cold/drafts), making life unbearable. This reflects industrialization’s discontents (Bierce hated modern "progress").
Final Couplet: Hypochondria
"With windows closed you are asthmatic; / Open, neuralgic or sciatic."
- Medical Satire: The old man’s hypochondria is exaggerated to absurdity, suggesting that longevity brings only ailments and complaints.
5. Themes in the Excerpt
The Absurdity of Longevity
- Living long doesn’t bring wisdom, just more time to witness folly (personal and societal).
- Example: The archbishop outlives his own corruption; the poet’s nostalgia is delusional.
Human Hypocrisy and Self-Deception
- People rewrite their pasts (the editor, the "truthful" draper) or romanticize history (the poet).
- Politicians and institutions (Depew, the President) are especially guilty of this.
Cynicism Toward Progress
- The "modern" world is no better than the past—just differently flawed.
- Technology (Weather Man) and politics are sources of new miseries.
The Uselessness of Memory
- The old remember trivia ("jokes were funny") but forget their own sins (the editor’s rascality).
- Implication: Memory is selective and unreliable.
6. Literary Devices Summary
| Device | Example | Effect |
|---|---|---|
| Irony | "Forgotten of the gods" as a definition for longevity. | Undermines the idea of long life as blessed. |
| Hyperbole | The Bristol draper’s 500 years of truthfulness. | Exposes how longevity tales are often lies. |
| Satire | Senator Depew "old enough to know better." | Attacks political incompetence. |
| Juxtaposition | Sacred (archbishop) vs. criminal (hanging). | Highlights moral hypocrisy. |
| Bathos | From "universal peace" to "early peas." | Mocks the triviality of old men’s complaints. |
| Parody | The poem’s exaggerated nostalgia. | Mimics sentimental verse to expose its emptiness. |
7. Significance and Bierce’s Worldview
- Anti-Sentimentalism: Bierce rejects nostalgia as a form of intellectual laziness. The past wasn’t better; people just forget its horrors.
- Distrust of Authority: Politicians, clergy, and journalists are all corrupt or deluded. Longevity doesn’t purify them—it exposes their flaws.
- Existential Cynicism: Life is meaningless suffering, and old age is the worst part—a time of physical decay and mental stagnation.
- Style as Weapon: Bierce’s dry, precise prose makes his satire more cutting. The Devil’s Dictionary format lets him pose as an objective lexicographer while delivering subjective venom.
8. Why This Excerpt Resonates Today
- Political Corruption: The jabs at Depew and the President feel timeless—critiques of career politicians and nepotism are still relevant.
- Media Distrust: The editor’s "memory" mirrors modern misinformation and historical revisionism.
- Aging and Disillusionment: The poem’s complaints about modern life echo Boomer nostalgia or Gen X cynicism—each generation thinks the world is worse now.
- Dark Humor: Bierce’s gallows humor appeals in an era of absurdist memes and nihilistic comedy (e.g., Rick and Morty, BoJack Horseman).
Final Thought: The Macrobian’s Curse
Bierce’s macrobian isn’t wise or venerable—he’s a fool who outlived his usefulness, clinging to false memories in a world that’s always been broken. The entry’s genius is in how it weaponsizes humor to expose the futility of human striving, whether for longevity, power, or meaning. In Bierce’s world, the only true macrobians are those who die young and avoid the farce of old age.